Friday, January 16, 2009

Men Must Be Happier.....

NICKNAMES 

If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call 

each other Laura, Kate and Sarah. 

If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately 

refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes. 



EATING OUT 


When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each 

Throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have 

anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back. 

When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators. 



MONEY 


A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. 

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need 

but it's on sale. 



BATHROOMS 


A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and 

toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel .. 

The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom 

is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items. 



ARGUMENTS 


A woman has the last word in any argument. 

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new 

argument. 



FUTURE 


A woman worries about the future until she gets a 

husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a 

wife. 



SUCCESS 


A successful man is one who makes more money than his 

Wife can spend. 

A successful woman is one who can find such a man. 



MARRIAGE 


A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he 

doesn't. 


A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, 

But she does. 



DRESSING UP 


A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, 

empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail. 


A man will dress up for weddings and funerals. 



NATURAL 


Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. 


Women somehow deteriorate during the night. 


OFFSPRING 


Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She 

knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite 

foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams. 


A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in 

the house. 



THOUGHT FOR THE DAY 


A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use 

In two people remembering the same thing! 



SO, send this to the women who have a sense of humor and 

Who can handle it .. and to the men who will enjoy reading it. 


Author - Annonymous